


The World's Greatest

by Sefiru



Category: Katekyou Hitman Reborn!, Pocket Monsters | Pokemon - All Media Types
Genre: Eevee Tsuna, Gen, Humor, Hurt/Comfort, No Plot, Trainer Arcobaleno, Trainer Reborn, Training, Tsuna is so done with this, Vignettes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-15
Updated: 2019-05-24
Packaged: 2019-11-18 16:27:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 5,819
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18123692
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sefiru/pseuds/Sefiru
Summary: Ever since he hatched, Tsuna has dreamed of having a trainer ... just not this one. Arceus have mercy.





	1. Tsuna

Tsuna took one look at the visitor to the Adoption Center and hid under a basket. He couldn’t help it; although he had wished for a trainer ever since he had hatched, this one was just too scary. The trainers Tsuna dreamed of were boys and girls just starting on their Pokemon journey, who could use an all-around Normal-type to back up their starter and wouldn’t mind that he didn’t know any fancy moves. The man standing at the railing was at least thirty years old and dressed like a Team Rocket executive. He smelled like coffee and gunpowder, and he _felt_ dangerous in a way that had Tsuna fleeing even before he turned sharp black eyes on the mons waiting for adoption.

It wasn’t like Tsuna would get picked anyway. He was too timid for most trainers to notice; the ones that expressed interest because he was an Eevee quickly changed their minds when they heard his background. Tsuna had heard the caretakers recite it so often he knew it by heart: abandoned egg, unknown sire, his probable mother a wild Vaporeon who was a notorious airhead. Even his nickname was no more than his egg’s catalogue number. Maybe he would eventually get picked up as a utility Pokemon, chasing bug-types out of someone’s garden; it was probably all he was good for.

“I want that one.” Tsuna peeked out to see who the terrifying man had picked, only to find a finger pointing straight at _him_. He squeaked and dove back under the basket.

“Are you sure?” asked the caretaker. “His file – ”

“I’ve already seen his file.” The man’s voice was cool and smooth. “The Eevee is the one I want.”

 _Why?_ What could such a dangerous person want with a mon as untalented as Tsuna? While he was still frozen with shock, the caretaker came over and dragged him out of his hiding place. “Come on, Dame-Tsuna, this is the best chance you’re likely to get.” 

It wasn’t like he had a choice; he wouldn’t last a week in the wild, hunting for roots and berries. Instead he was going to end up getting shot in a gang war, like in one of those true crime shows the caretaker left playing on the TV. “Vieeee!”

“As you can see, Sir, he’s rather timid.”

“I can fix that.” The man’s smile was not at all reassuring. He plucked Tsuna out of the caretaker’s arms. “Hello, fluffy one. My name is Reborn, and starting today, I’ll be your trainer.” Tsuna could only whimper.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This story has about as much plot as the average Pokemon game, ie very little. I do have several more parts written; three guesses who the rest of Reborn's Pokemon team are going to be. ^^


	2. Leon

Tsuna was surprised, but not exactly relieved, that Reborn didn’t immediately stow him in a pokeball. Instead, he let Tsuna ride on his shoulder while he bought a cup of coffee and then sat on a park bench to drink it. “Why did it have to be Team Rocket?” Tsuna grumbled.

“I don’t work for Team Rocket; I’m a freelancer,” said Reborn. Tsuna nearly jumped out of his fur.

“You can understand Pokémon speech?”

“I don’t need to; I can read minds.” Tsuna’s ears drooped – that was even less believable. Still, the man clearly understood what Tsuna was saying.

“What do you want with me? I’ve got no pedigree or special skills.”

Reborn gave him a mysterious smile. “I’ve spent a long time using my abilities to help others train their Pokemon. It’s time I put together a team of my own, and you’re going to be my starter.”

Tsuna was confused. “Who, me? What about _him_?” He pointed to the Kecleon dozing on Reborn’s hat.

“Leon is more the creative type.”

Leon cracked an eye open. “I’m an artist, not a fighter,” he agreed.

“But, I’m no good at anything,” Tsuna protested. “Even the adoption center staff say so.”

“I can see a lot of potential in you, Fluffy-Tsuna. I won’t be satisfied with anything less than a League Championship,” Reborn said gleefully. Tsuna groaned; he had been adopted by lunatics. League Champion? Him? 

“Leon, the weather report, please,” Reborn said once he finished his coffee. The Kecleon hopped down from his hat and transformed into a _working radio_. Which duly tuned in to the weather channel.

“How is that even possible?” demanded Tsuna.

Leon reverted to his normal form. “My father was a Ditto.”

“But … radio … Transform doesn’t work that way!”

“No one appreciates my art.” Leon climbed back onto Reborn’s hat and closed his eyes.

“Time to head out,” said Reborn. “We have a lot of training to do before you’re ready for the League.” He pulled a gun out from under his jacket and pointed it at Tsuna. “Let’s start with Protect. Think fast!”

“Vieeeeeeeeeeeee!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Now that Leon's a speaking character, he needed a characterization. Hence, Leon the avant-garde performance artist.


	3. Takeshi

Three days in, and Tsuna was already exhausted. Not from walking, since Reborn let him ride on his shoulder, but from the fiendish training exercises and general insanity of the trainer and his Kecleon. He still had no idea how Reborn kept his crisp black suit from getting covered in road dust; his fur got coated in it. Reborn did make sure to brush him every evening – with Leon, morphed into a hairbrush. When Tsuna tried to thank the Kecleon, he responded with, “Utility is incidental to my creative vision.”

Likewise, when Tsuna asked if it hurt to turn into an espresso pot and sit on a camp stove, Leon said only, “An artist must become one with his medium.”

Besides grooming, one thing Tsuna could count on was good food and a long break at lunch. The world outside the adoption center was still new to him, with so many different plants and flowers to investigate. Yesterday, he had even found a wild Razz berry! He was cautiously sniffing around the edges of the meadow they had stopped in when movement under a bush caught his attention. He froze, but when nothing else happened, he got a feeling that he should look closer. He crept into the bushes and discovered a Farfetch’d lying there with a broken wing.

“Are you all right?” Stupid; he obviously wasn’t.

“Don’t worry about me, I’m done for,” the Farfetch’d said with fake cheer. “Someone will come along to devour me soon enough.”

“Don’t say things like that!” Tsuna knew it was a fact of living in the wild, but he didn’t like to hear a Pokemon just _give up_ like this. “Wait right here.”

“Ahaha, I won’t be going far!”

Tsuna scampered back to his trainer, only to find him fast asleep on the grass, his hat over his eyes and Leon sprawled on his chest. “What a useless trainer …” He tipped over Reborn’s expensive designer-leather trainer’s bag, then rummaged around in it for an empty pokeball. He picked it up in his teeth and carried it back to the Farfetch’d. 

“Don’t mind me, I’m sure I’ll make someone a good dinner … you’re little, I could probably feed you for a week.”

Irritated, Tsuna spat the pokeball at him. It popped open, engulfed the bird, and registered the capture. Tsuna picked it up again and went back to Reborn, who was still sleeping. He put the ball down and nipped Reborn’s hand.

“That’s the hand that feeds you, you know. Why all the fuss, Fluffy-Tsuna?” Reborn sat up, and spotted the newly occupied pokeball. “I see you’ve made a start on assembling a team.”

“What? That’s not – he needs a Pokemon Center!” His trainer was the most aggravating Human on the _planet_. 

Luckily, they were not far from the next town; a short stay in the Pokemon Center’s healing machine had the Farfetch’d fully recovered. When Reborn let him out of the pokeball, he tested his healed wing with a few swings of his leek. Tsuna blinked; for a moment, he would swear that the leek turned into a _real sword_. “Did you see that?”

“Interesting,” said Reborn. “You’ve picked a Pokemon with a lot of potential to add to your team.”

Tsuna’s ears drooped. “Don’t listen to him,” he told the Farfetch’d. “You don’t have to get involved with this League Challenge stuff if you don’t want to.”

“Ahaha, that sounds like a fun game! How do you play it?”

“First rule: no more dying.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Takeshi the fatalistic swordsduck.
> 
> And Tsuna has no thumbs. This will continue to vex him.


	4. Hibari

Another day on the road, this one under a constant drizzle, with Leon providing an umbrella. The Farfetch’d, who had dubbed himself Takeshi, hopped cheerfully from puddle to puddle, while Tsuna’s fur went frizzy from the damp. They stopped for lunch in a grove of trees; looking for a spot that was actually _dry_ , Tsuna stuck his nose into a hollow in one of the tree trunks.

To his dismay, it was already occupied. Slitted violet eyes glared at him from the dark. “Herbivore. For disturbing me, I shall Bite you to death.”

“Vieeee!” Tsuna turned tail and ran; he needed to stop letting his curiosity get the better of him. He glanced back, hoping he’d heard the voice wrong, but no; he had a high-leveled Persian after him. Bite was bad enough from Rattata, and he didn’t want to know how much damage _those_ teeth would do. 

Takeshi, showing more team spirit than sense, tried to strike with his leek, but the cat batted him aside without slowing. Tsuna sprinted straight for where Reborn was having his usual midday nap. He went right over him, and heard a grunt as the Persian stepped on his trainer. Good, maybe that would wake him up. Tsuna dodged around a tree, and came face-to-face with his pursuer; he shrieked and reversed direction.

“Why aren’t you helping?” he yelled at Reborn.

“Fighting wild mons is the Pokemon’s job,” his trainer said. “You’ll never make it to the League Championship with that attitude.”

“Take your championship – ” Tsuna barely evaded a swipe of claws – “And shove it!” He saw the fangs coming in time to set up Endure, and then he was picked up and flung across the clearing.

Tsuna had had enough. He was _not_ going to get killed in a damp forest by a grumpy feline while his jerk of a trainer watched. Something shifted inside him; he opened his mouth, and a jet of orange-white fire shot out. The oncoming Persian was bowled over backwards, and Tsuna sat down with shock. What _was_ that? He hadn’t even known he knew a move like that!

“Interesting.” A pokeball landed on the Persian and engulfed him; Tsuna flinched, but the ball only rocked violently and then clicked shut. “That’s an unusual move you just performed, Fluffy-Tsuna. And this one will make a strong addition to the team.”

“Are you _insane?_ ” Tsuna yelped. “He tried to eat me!”

“I’m sure you would have been tasty,” said Takeshi.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tsuna discovers his main character powers.


	5. Lal

Reborn took both Tsuna and his new teammate (Arceus, _why_?) to the nearest Pokemon Center for a checkup. The Persian was now Hibari, by the terribly imaginative method of pulling cards from a deck and turning the numbers into a name. Not that Tsuna had room to talk. Besides, he had other things on his mind: “I didn’t think Eevee could learn Flamethrower,” he said as Reborn brushed him.

“They can’t,” Reborn said cheerfully. “I believe that was a move called X-Burner; it occurs only as an egg move in certain bloodlines. And since that’s the case, I have an idea who your sire is.”

Why did that statement give Tsuna a sense of impending doom? Did he have an Absol in his lineage somewhere? Reborn continued, “My colleague Lal has an Incineroar that knows it.”

“Incineroar? Aren’t they notoriously arrogant and bad-mannered?” And there it was; doom.

After collecting Hibari’s pokeball from the nurse, Reborn went to the bank of videophones (apparently even Leon had limits) and made a call.

“Reborn, you reprobate.” The woman on the other end was wearing military fatigues. She looked like she had had a long day already and Reborn hadn’t improved it. “I heard you’re finally forming a team of your own. Didn’t think you’d pick such a fluffy mon, though.” She addressed Tsuna directly. “Hey there, I’m Lal. Don’t let Reborn’s looks fool you; he’s evil to the core.”

Tsuna’s ears drooped. “I _know_.”

“Ah, but Tsuna here is no ordinary Pokemon; he knows X-Burner,”said Reborn. “Remember a couple of years ago, when your Iemitsu wouldn’t shut up about finding the love of his life?”

Lal pinched her nose. “Oh, yeah. I offered to go back and catch her, but ‘she’s too gentle for the fighting life.’ Then I suggested releasing him but ‘his work on the team is too important’. And somehow they’re still soulmates.” The quotes were heavy with sarcasm. “He was a gift from someone I can’t afford to piss off, so I can’t get rid of him. Furball, be glad you take after your mother.”

For the first time in his life, Tsuna was. Anyway, “I’d kind of have to, unless she was a Ditto.”

“I know that, and you know that. Iemitsu is still going on about his ‘cute little Litten,’ even though he knows full well that he mated with a Vaporeon.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tsuna does have an Absol in his ancestry ... about ten generations back, and his name was Giotto. :)


	6. Hayato

Tsuna was getting used to the pace of travelling, and he could spend an hour in the morning and after lunch walking beside his trainer rather than riding on his shoulder. Hibari spent most of the travel time in his pokeball; he had not taken well to being captured _at all_ , but Reborn had bribed him with hamburger and the promise of battle.

On the up side, such as it was, Tsuna got plenty of practice with X-Burner. Why Reborn didn’t keep him in a pokeball too, Tsuna didn’t know. He had even done something to keep Tsuna from returning himself; probably with the excuse of toughening him up. They were walking on a paved road today, cars and trucks passing them in both directions, and Tsuna had seen (and smelled) more litter than he ever wanted to.

This time, though, it was his ears that got him in trouble, when he detected a faint whimper coming from a box lying in the ditch. He trotted over and lifted the flap with his nose. Inside was a Houndour puppy, half starved and suffering from Poison on top of apparently being thrown out of a car window. Underneath it lay the halves of a broken pokeball. Tsuna winced in sympathy; he wouldn’t wish that kind of rejection on any mon. “I’ll be right back,” he promised.

He dashed to where Reborn was asking a Ledian for directions. Without even asking, he vaulted headfirst into the trainer’s satchel; he knew there were Antidotes in there somewhere. He spotted one, grabbed it, and ran back to the Houndour. It took him a couple of tries to work the spray without thumbs, but as soon as the medicine was on him, the Houndour started to look better. “You came back,” he muttered.

“I couldn’t just leave you like that,” said Tsuna. “Um, I’m Tsuna. Can you stand? Do you want help getting to a Pokemon Center?”

The Houndour stared at him. Like a lot of Dark-types, the shape of his head made him look angry no matter what he was actually feeling.

“Fluffy-Tsuna.” Reborn had walked up behind him without Tsuna noticing, and now he scooped him right off the ground. “We need to get moving to reach town before dark.”

“Wait! At least let me leave a potion for …” Tsuna trailed off as the Houndour scrambled out of the box and stood at Reborn’s feet.

“Please, take me with you!” he barked. “I will gratefully follow you as my trainer, Tsuna-sama!”

“Me?” Was that done? He was a Pokemon too! Reborn gave Tsuna one of his infuriating smirks.

“Pick out a pokeball for your starter, Fluffy-Tsuna.”

“St-st-starter?!” The Houndour’s eyes went round with puppyish amazement. Tsuna sighed. The whole idea was absurd, but at least this way he could make sure the Dark-type got proper care. He ducked into Reborn’s bag again; by now he knew which pocket the pokeballs were in. Among them was a Heal ball; when he held it out, the Houndour practically jumped into it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hayato the rescue puppy ...


	7. Reborn

Reborn always checked into fancy hotels when they stayed in town, ones with rooms large enough for a trainer to let his whole team out. Which Reborn did, unfortunately. Hibari lurked under the bed and swiped his paws at Tsuna if he came too close. Takeshi went straight for the bathtub. And Reborn set Tsuna on his lap for his nightly brushing, while the Houndour sat on the rug and made puppy eyes at him, wagging.

“Um, how are you feeling?” Tsuna asked him. 

“I am at full health, Tsuna-sama! Command me to do anything; I can act as a battle or contest pokemon! I know some really neat moves … um, _Scary Face!_ ”

“Vieee!” Tsuna jumped and hid behind Reborn. The Houndour dropped onto his belly.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry …”

Tsuna took a couple of deep breaths. “It’s effective, I’ll give it that.” He hopped down, keeping one eye on Hibari’s paws, and started grooming the Houndour’s ears. “It’s all right. Do you have a nickname you like to use?” he asked between licks. He wasn’t letting Reborn choose again if he could help it.

“…Hayato. It’s what my mother called me.”

“It’s nice to meet you, Hayato.” Takeshi strolled out of the bathroom, leaving a trail of dripping water, and perched on a chair back to preen his feathers.

Reborn raised the Leon-brush. “Your turn, Hayato. I will not have a slovenly pokemon on Fluffy-Tsuna’s team. Tsuna, there should be a polishing kit for his armor in my bag.”

Once again longing for thumbs, Tsuna stuck his head in the bag; Hayato climbed up on the bed beside Reborn. “Oi. How did you understand what my name is?”

“It’s quite simple.” Reborn tilted his fedora over his eyes and smirked. “I’m an Aura Guardian.” 

Four pokemon gave him incredulous stares; Hibari even stuck his head out from under the bed to do so. Leon just said, “Wasn’t it obvious?” while still shaped like a brush. It would explain the claims of mind-reading and the dust-proof suit. But still – 

“Aura Guardian. You,” said Tsuna. “You’re a sadist trainer and your ego is so big it counts as a special ability. And you said you’re freelance, but you still do jobs for Team Rocket.”

“It’s right in the motto: they protect the world from devastation.”

“I will shed on you. I don’t care if you made your suit impervious, I will find a way.”

“There’s the resolve you’ll need to become Champion,” Reborn said cheerfully. “And you shouldn’t be so sceptical, Fluffy-Tsuna. After all, you have the ability to use Aura too.”

“What.” Was that why Reborn had picked him? But he’d never felt anything that might be Aura; he was just a low-level Normal-type.

“Not only that, each of the pokemon you’ve chosen also has the ability. I doubt it’s a coincidence.”

“All of us?” said Hayato. “Then I’ll surely use my Aura to serve you, Tsuna-sama!”

“You had better learn to give me a good battle, herbivore,” said Hibari, and disappeared under the bed again.

“That sounds like a fun game to play,” added Takeshi. Tsuna climbed back into the trainer’s bag and pulled the flap closed after him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Arcobaleno = Aura Guardian in this AU.


	8. Dino

“I’ve arranged for some transportation,” Reborn announced as they left the hotel. Tsuna made a face; he was certain this new development would prove hazardous to his health and sanity.

“What is it? A palanquin carried by Machamp? A Moltres-shaped wingsuit?”

“A motorcycle.” That sounded … sensible? Tsuna glanced upward to check for flying Tepigs. Reborn continued, “I’m picking it up a little way out of town. Keep up, Fluffy-Tsuna.” He strode off down the road, leaving Tsuna to trot after him.

Just when Tsuna was getting tired enough to climb onto Reborn’s shoulder, they arrived at a farm. There were several low buildings, a pond, and fenced-off fields for mons to graze in. A Rapidash was nibbling on a hay bale in the front paddock; as they approached, he galloped up to greet them. Or at least, he tried to; on the way, he blundered into the open gate and knocked both it and himself over.

“I see you haven’t grown out of that,” said Reborn.

“I’m OK when I’m on stage.” The Rapidash stood up and shook himself off. “Do I want to know what you’re doing here, Reborn? And is this your latest victim?”

“Hi, I’m Tsuna,” Tsuna said.

“I’m Dino. You can hop over if you want.” Tsuna considered the distance, and then jumped onto Dino’s back. 

“Reborn trained you too?”

“For about a year. I learned moves I wouldn’t have been able to otherwise, but I’m mentally scarred forever.”

“It’s the aim of every teacher to be remembered by his students,” Reborn said, smirking. “I’m going to see a Lackey about a bike. And Fluffy-Tsuna, your team should get a chance to stretch their legs too.”

Oh, no. “Run,” Tsuna told Dino. The Rapidash laughed and took off at full gallop with Tsuna hanging on for dear life. Hayato bounded along at his heels and Takeshi kept up easily on the wing, squabbling all the while about which of them counted as Tsuna’s starter, since he had caught Takeshi first. Tsuna didn’t think it mattered one way or the other. “You’re a Contest pokemon?” he asked Dino.

“Yeah; stunt shows too, sometimes.” A huge Mudsdale came up beside them, keeping in perfect step with Dino despite the difference in size. “This is my Contest partner, Romario.”

“Hi,” Tsuna managed. He was getting used to the speed, he thought – and then Hibari planted himself in their path, and Dino nearly went rump over teakettle as he stopped.

“Are you strong?” Hibari demanded.

“I have some experience, why?”

“Fight me!” The Persian pounced. Dino sidestepped, suddenly nimble, and countered with a flaming Tail Whip.

“Vieeeeeeeeeee!” yelled Tsuna, who was still clinging to Dino’s back. As they passed close to the haystack, he dove off into it and burrowed in deep. 

After a minute there was a rustle beside him. “Tsuna-sama! I am here to protect you!” Hayato barked. “I shall stand between you and any danger!”

“Be careful not to set the hay on – ” _FWOOM_. “… Never mind.” At least Hayato’s heart was in the right place. Tsuna sighed and started to claw his way free of the blazing grass.

Takeshi appeared next to him. “Are we having a roast?”

“No, we are not! Help me get out of this.” Tsuna was planning to go straight for the pond. Their efforts to get free scattered burning hay all over the field; Romario tried to stamp it out, but that put the smaller mons at risk of being stepped on. Tsuna yelped again.

A cascade of water doused the scene. “Would you all settle down?” called a Blastoise from the pond. “We’re trying to play Shogi.” An Octillery beside him nodded agreement.

“Sorry, Enzo,” Dino answered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dino the fire horse was kind of inevitable. Also Dino&Skull is apparently my headcanon now.


	9. Lambo

The motorcycle caused only slight changes in their routine. There was a cup holder in front of the seat where Tsuna rode when he wasn’t enduring a training exercise; they travelled farther in a day, but still stopped for a long lunch. Hibari ate his hamburger and sprawled out for a nap; Takeshi strolled off to find lunch the old-fashionned way. (Tsuna had been disturbed to discover that Takeshi’s ideas on who was edible went both ways. Those poor Weedle.) Tsuna continued his practice of exploring herbs and flowers, with a loudly and enthusiastically protective Hayato trailing after him. He _did_ feel a little safer with the Houndour around, provided he didn’t set Tsuna on fire. 

“What do you think of this one, Hayato? It kind of smells like mint.”

“It might be catnip, Tsuna-sama. Should we bring some to Hibari to check?”

Arceus, no. “I don’t think that’s a good idea … did you hear that?” There was a clang, and then the sound of a pokemon yelling. It was coming from where they’d left the motorcycle; Tsuna scampered over to look.

A tiny Mareep, barely more than a hatchling, was standing in the road. “I’m challenging you to a battle! Stop ignoring me!” he shouted … at Reborn’s motorcycle. “I’ll show you how well I can fight!” He tried to headbutt the front tire, bounced off, and fell on his rump. He started crying. “Why won’t you say anything?”

“Um … you know that’s not a pokemon, right?” said Tsuna.

“No way! Lambo is sure this is a foreign Steel-type! A rude one.” He tried to Thunderwave the bike, with no effect. Tsuna sighed.

“That’s a machine, Lambo; it can’t talk. Aren’t you a little young to be out on your own?”

“I’m not lost!”

“Yes you are,” said Hayato.

“Lambo is a wandering warrior, seeking battle across the land! I’m not scared! Or lonely!”

Tsuna suspected he would have been hungry, too, if he hadn’t been able to eat grass. Right, if the little Mareep wanted battle _that_ much, he could do it in a gym, with supervision. “Hayato, bring him along, please.”

Hayato caught Lambo’s scruff in his teeth and carried him, kicking and complaining, in Tsuna’s wake. Tsuna once again went digging in Reborn’s bag for a pokeball. (Wasn’t this part the trainer’s job? Reborn had slept through all the noise.) Lambo’s eyes went big and round when he saw it. “You want Lambo on your team?”

Hayato set him down. “Pfeh, wool flavour … Tsuna-sama, do you think Reborn will agree to this?”

“It’s what he gets for letting me do the recruiting.” Tsuna didn’t give a fig for the League or crafting a ‘balanced’ team. Besides, he’d like to see Reborn brush out _that_.

“Yay! Lambo won’t let you down, Tsuna-nii!”

“Get in the ball, Lambo.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lambo the lightning lamb! ^^


	10. Giovanni

Team Rocket had a mansion. The TV shows had them operating out of warehouses and back-alley bars; the building Reborn parked behind glittered with polished stone and glass, it sat in the middle of a broad garden and it had at least four storeys. Reborn had Leon turn into a key and let himself in. Tsuna, riding on his shoulder, hunched into a ball.

“We’re all going to get shot,” he muttered.

“Cheer up, Fluffy-Tsuna – you get shot at all the time,” said Reborn.

“Yeah, by _you_.” They encountered a housemaid, who greeted Reborn by name.

“The Don is in the conservatory,” she said. “I will inform him that you’ve arrived.” Reborn knew the way without asking. He came to a double door, knocked and went in. On the other side was an indoor garden; present were three humans of different ages and a Lycanroc. Reborn greeted the eldest man with a handshake.

“Timoteo, I trust you’ve been well?”

“I have. And you? It’s been quite a while. You remember my son Enrico, I’m sure.” Another handshake. “And this is my grandson Giovanni.”

“H’llo.” The boy was about four years old, and more interested in his toys than the visitors. Meanwhile, the Lycanroc turned a gimlet eye on Tsuna.

“I am Nougat, team leader to Don Timoteo. And you are?”

“Um, I’m Tsuna, I’m Reborn’s team leader … I think.” Nougat managed to look down his nose at him, despite Tsuna being perched above his head.

“I didn’t expect you to show up with such a cute mon,” said Timoteo. “What’s the rest of your team like?”

Reborn reached for his balls. “See for yourself.” Tsuna considered fleeing, but Reborn’s shoulder was the safest place he could see. Hibari came out, gave the room one unimpressed look and flopped down in a sunbeam to nap. Lambo charged Nougat and started Thundershocking him, to no effect at all.

“Ahaha, want to play a game, Hayato?” said Takeshi.

“No; I must be ready to hear Tsuna-sama’s orders!”

Enrico raised a sceptical eyebrow. “Your team is a little unbalanced.”

Reborn smirked. “Do you think I can’t make it work?”

“If you win the League with this team, I’ll pay you a hundred grand,” said Enrico.

“And if I lose … I’ll give you my hat.” Reborn scooped Tsuna off his shoulder and set him on the floor. “Go play, Fluffy-Tsuna, we have some business to discuss.” Team Rocket business; Tsuna didn’t want to know. He decided he’d better stop Lambo from aggravating their host’s pokemon any further.

“Stop underestimating the great Lambo-sama! I’m gonna evolve into a Bouffalant, and then you’ll see!”

“Do you want to tell him, or should I?” muttered Hayato.

“Let him dream a little longer. Come on, Lambo, I saw a bowl of fruit over there … ”

Nougat took a step after them, and Hayato blocked his path, glaring. The older canine snorted at him. “Settle down, pup. Have you lot even had a gym battle yet?”

“Not yet,” said Tsuna. The adult humans were talking about shutting down a pokemon trafficking ring – which was weird, since Tsuna had thought Team Rocket _ran_ that kind of business. He was starting to think the TV shows weren’t telling the whole story. Meanwhile, Giovanni had put down his toys and was sneaking up on Hibari, his eyes round with fascination. Just as he was reaching out to touch, Hibari cracked his eyes open and hissed at him.

Tsuna cringed; he didn’t want to find out if Hibari would Bite a small child to death. Enrico called over, “Giovanni, let the nice Persian sleep.”

“Papa, I want one!”

Hibari flicked his tail at the boy, making him topple on his rear. “Do you think you can handle one of my kind, herbivore?”

Giovanni, who of course didn’t understand him, grinned widely. “Big kitty Persian! I want one, Papa!”

“That one is on Reborn’s team,” Enrico told him. “I suppose I can keep an eye out for a Meowth.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You know Reborn is serious when he bets his hat.


	11. First badge

“This,” announced Reborn, “will be the place for your first gym battle.” The building was stark concrete overgrown with ivy, dark shadows in the windows.

“Do I have to?” sighed Tsuna. In the name of training, he had been shot at, chewed on, thrown off cliffs, shoved under waterfalls, fed pistachio nuts, and set on fire. He didn’t know how many super potions he had gone through. “What kind of gym is this, anyway?” There were carvings of skulls above all the windows.

“It’s a ghost-type gym,” Reborn said gleefully.

“A lot of use I’ll be, then,” Tsuna sniffed. He had a few off-type moves, but not enough to get through a gym battle; Hayato and Hibari would be doing most of the fighting.

“Their attacks can’t hurt you either,” Reborn pointed out. “I thought you’d appreciate an easy start.”

Tsuna eyed him suspiciously. “Since when do you do anything the easy way?” Reborn tilted his hat over his eyes and entered the building. The inside was just as spooky as the outside, though knowing it was set up that way on purpose made it easier to handle.

Then the Gym Leader popped out of a shadow right in front of them. “Vieeeee!” Tsuna did his best to scramble tail-first down the back of Reborn’s jacket.

“Fluffy-Tsuna, kindly don’t put holes in my shirt. As you can see, I have a rookie team,” Reborn told the … person. They were covered head to toe with only their eyes showing; Tsuna couldn’t even smell them.

“You wouldn’t be one of those assholes who one-shots the gym with a Raticate, would you?” They sounded like a male, at least.

“Nope,” Reborn assured him. It was almost believable.

“… Is that so. The first badge challenge is two pokemon; you may use up to six mons to defeat them. Follow the arrows.” Tsuna didn’t emerge from Reborn’s jacket until they reached the gym’s arena. Reborn set him on the floor. 

“I expect to see your best effort, Fluffy-Tsuna. The fate of my hat is at stake.”

“Might as well get it over with. Maybe Lambo wants to watch? He’s never seen a gym battle.”

The Gym Leader was suddenly present again. “Are you prepared?”

“We are,” said Reborn. He let the little Mareep out and set him on top of a railing. “Lambo here is going to watch.” The Gym Leader just nodded; he had a pokemon watching too, a Shuppet.

Tsuna’s first opponent was a Lampent. It floated above the arena floor and studied him with inscrutable glowing eye-spots. “Is this a joke?”

“Yes, and I’m the butt of it.” Tsuna’s ears drooped. “Look, can you just chase me around a bit so my trainer is satisfied?”

“I heard that, Fluffy-Tsuna!”

“Go get him, Tsuna-nii!” 

The only useful move he had was X-Burner, and Reborn had threatened dire consequences if he used that in a battle before the Champoinships ( _an ace in the hole, not a crutch_ , was the phrase he’d used). Tsuna tried a Tackle, which the Lampent easily dodged, then a Quick Attack, which did maybe one point of damage. Two if he was lucky.

“This is embarrassing,” said the Lampent.

“I know! I’m losing to a light fixture!”

“That’s racist.” It hit him with a Scorch that left him burnt. Reborn called him back and sent out Hayato.

“You dare cause harm to Tsuna-sama!” he growled.

“It’s a gym battle, you idiot. Wait, watch where you’re putting those teeth!” While Hayato Crunched the Lampent a bit, Reborn sprayed burn heal on Tsuna. 

“Good as new.”

Lambo bounced up and down. “Yay! That was awesome, Tsuna-nii.” Tsuna thought Lambo was too easily impressed. 

The Lampent fainted and got returned. “Who’s next?” barked Hayato. “Bring it on!”

“Jaeger, go.”

Jaeger was an Alolan Marowak. “Well, shit,” said Hayato. “This is going to hurt … both of us!” The ensuing duel was brutal, with both pokemon using super-effective moves on each other. Tsuna growled. If Hayato got seriously hurt, he didn’t care what Reborn said; the Marowak was getting an X-Burner to the face. It didn’t come to that; when Hayato’s health got low, Reborn switched him out with Hibari.

“False carnivore, I will Bite you to death.”

Jaeger levelled his club at him. “What is dead can never die.” Then they sprang at each other. This time, the Marowak’s Ground moves did no extra damage, and Hibari was a much higher level than Hayato. In short order his Bite reduced Jaeger to fainting. Hibari looked disappointed when the gym leader returned him, and padded back to Reborn.

“I demand hamburger.”

“That’s our next stop,” Reborn promised him. Tsuna was just glad that the Persian hadn’t tried to eat him again.

The gym leader turned to his Shuppet. “What to you think, Bermuda? Have they earned the badge?”

“They’ll do, I suppose,” said Bermuda. The gym leader smiled – probably, it was hard to tell with that checkered cloth across his face – and tossed a badge to Reborn.

“You’ve put together an unusual team, Trainer. I’ll be interested to see how you progress. Yes, very interested indeed.”

Tsuna was more annoyed than alarmed at the feeling of Doom that swept over him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was that asshole with a Raticate. ^^;
> 
> This fic leaves off here for now. I'm off traveling for the next couple of weeks, and then .... *kufufufufu* ....


End file.
